Digging in the Past

This is always painful for me. In every aspect and form. That is why I prefer to live in the moment as much as possible. That does not mean I don't try to plan. And it does mean that I always still have hopes and dreams about the future. But one can put too much weight to it. Life is just not like that. Recent happenings have just proved that out. One more time.

I finally had the opportunity to look at some of my mother's things. They have been in storage for a very long time. If I had had access to them earlier, I would have enjoyed the opportunity to discuss some questions with her. I think she would have enjoyed that too. But my being blocked in doing that is just another hole in my heart if I dwell on that. I am trying not to be too hard on myself for not staying the week, after Mother's Day. I

And now I am digging in the past of my own things too. Since buried with all her things, were my old school books and some of my keepsakes. My old cowboy hero scrapbook and some of my favourite comic books.

And I found the following essay. I think it is from Grade Five. It is interesting that I compare myself to a tree since only a few weeks ago I wrote another poem, also comparing myself to a tree. And my most recent post in this blog is also about the new tree I got last year, which did not survive the winter.