Fifty-One Cents

1:00pm
This morning I got a 8 dollar roast beef and 4 pounds of strawberries for 51 cents. How great is that??!!

That is because I had decided that this Sunday I would 'cash-in' my coupons from buying gas over the last few weeks. And the stawberries were on for only 1.50 each! (I hope there is not some awful reason they are so inexpensive). I have washed and cut up one box already and will freeze them in little bags for use over the next few weeks (or longer). I still have quite a few left from last week and so they will have to be eaten in the next day or two since they are past their best. I also have some of the Saskatoon's from the Farmer's Market of two weeks ago. The seem ok still. Taste ok.

I also made a stir-fry from the remaining veggies from a while ago (still good), mixed with the peas I was given yesterday. And now I am making some brown rice. This will be for my lunches for the coming week.

And later I will cook the roast and make a lovely pot roast with potatoes, carrots and onions. It was a small roast but should be enough to add to the stir fry as well as make sandwiches or have with other things for supper.

I have not been having much of a supper these past two weeks because I have been taking a very good lunch to have on my break (feeling I probably need the energy earlier in the day..which is true). And with the supplements I am taking I am not falling down depleted later in the afternoon like I see some of the other classmates doing).

This kind of schedule works a lot better for me and maybe I won't have to cook anything this next week. Not that I mind cooking, since I do like it. But that will leave time for other things.

So all this is working.

Gorgeous Morning

Today it is a little cloudy and they are predicting some showers. But yesterday!.....was a totally magnificent day when I started out on my little journey to see my mother. I want to make sure I record my enjoyable feelings.

As I was starting out in the parking lot, I looked over at the flowers and the small garden plot of lettuce and onions I have in the planter. Three sparrows settled on the railing just as I was driving away and flew to a tree across the parking lot. I had forgotten to fill the birdbath with water, so they also missed the food that was in the bread box on which the bird bath is situated.

I know that if I had a tree we would get birds. And it would be so enjoyable to be able to watch them up close.

As I drove around the street and past the front door of our building, I noticed May's clematis is spectacular. Magenta flower on a trellis about 6 feet high...and they have shaped themselves into a huge heart...just like her. How wonderful.

I am totally enjoying having my weekends off, getting paid while I train for my new job, and generally feeling like I have a hope for something sustainable in the way of future income, since my new job will pay me for going out of my way and working hard (unlike the last one).

And, another element that is enjoyable is having a new doggie friend who I can take out for walks.

My New Friends

I am over the funk I was in. Thank God. Literally. I should be practicing going inside EVERY morning but I have been slack, and it shows.

I have been saved by meditating today...and also by reading some of the book by Eckhart Tolle...on practicing things from this book "The Moment Called Now" (hope that is the correct title). I certainly was taken over by what he calls the pain-body. So I have been saved, but only saved by a hair. It does not mean I can get cocky about it...that is for sure. I will try to meditate again tonight.

I really really feel so blessed to have found such a nice person, so close, with what could be a lot in common. And with two doggies. And one that needs walking!!! Now...how about that!!

So I am very very GRATEFUL...in spite of what I may have written elsewhere. I must make that very clear because that is very important.

"Friends" and "Relatives"

I don't know whether to write this topic straight on, or discuss all the associations the 'quotation marks' conjure up. I can see many different layers which is why I suppose I am writing. And because of the potential for many perspectives, I should be very careful. It is at times like now that I will say things that I maybe shouldn't say....that will lead to 'trouble'.

For, I am beyond exhaustion. I should have gone right to bed and gone to sleep. Now I have gone past that point when one can relax, and I am just operating on yucky energy. I am also getting very angry. That is what can lead to saying something others will not appreciate. So I will just go slow for now.

I feel like I would like to blast a whole lot of people. But that is not a very 'conscious' thing to do. All I will do for now is applaud myself for at least getting onto the sight and starting up again. After all I see that Blogger has done a whole lot of good new things that anyone can use.

I am always this tired after having to deal with my brother's 'hospitality'. No place to sleep properly. (He thinks we should just camp out like fucking hippies). No place to get properly clean. (He thinks nobody should have a shower. They should bathe over and over in dirty water). No discussions of what he would like to see happen. (Mostly just activities done to favour HIS concepts and everyone has to fit it....or else). No clean clothes. (He thinks everyone should just live like he does...in total discomfort). (I had my same clothes on for two days and slept in them overnight...and that was for a one day trip only...just to see my mother). And the big one...No sleep...because I had to drive 3 hours x two...just to see my mother...and get up at 4:30am when I got home to go to work. And the work is not 'usual' work. It is beyond the pale of shitiness...driven on by greed and sick energy. Not normal. Slave work. For slave wages.

And I am not young. So..like I said...I will write later...on this topic. Haven't even got to the 'friends' or 'relatives' part yet.